She's cute… who'd disagree? (One-eyed hacks with obsessions for silicon-enhanced Yankee-doodle mall-rats aside.) True Brit. National treasure. (And private pleasure for armies of adolescent boys.) Not just Brit(ney) -ish. Definition: American dish - fast food, throwaway wrapper, serves up cold. B.I.L.L.I.E.… it's her real name. No false pretensions. No (false) top-heavy extensions. Just a natural girl - au naturel.

Her face a perfect symmetry… Go on, take down a photograph from the gallery on your wall. Your choice… warm, getting warmer, that's it! - a hot selection from the collection. Billie cut in two pieces. Deface that face? Why? Because we want to! Sprinkle some Piper magic on a computer… Shoo be doo be doo doop boo hoo - then carefully place the two left-half profiles together: then the two right - and what do you get? Double Take. Two strikingly similar Billie shots. That's the fundamental power of the girl. One becomes two. HONEY to a TEE X 2.

Billie's Fundamental: Born: September 22, 1982. Height: 5 foot 5 inches. Middle name: PAUL. Star sign: Virgo.

Put your X Cross X by Billie. Vote for B.I.L.L.I.E! As Returning Officer for the Election of the Princess of Pop, the result is that the EYES have it: two big hazel/green, doe-eyed pools of persuasion. She's got classic appeal. Baby (Babe) facial proportions - Billie not Bunton. She's gamine: so Be mine. She's a Bambi: soft, unthreatening, inviting, seductive. Hmm… fancy that; and doing the visage trick? Now you know she's One in a Million… Us mere mortals just produce two mongrel specimens. But most mortals don't have that jaw line, those cheekbones, those beautiful big, all-enveloping gateways to the soul, or that brillian(teen) white, voluptuously soft-lipped and sensually surrounded, gateway of teeth. Indisputable ingenue. Make those perfect measurements - count - eyes to nose to chin to cheek to cheek: you wish!

Wish upon a star… Born in the old railway town of Swindon (now dubbed 'Silicon valley'/M4 corridor.) Local stop: Secondary School for a year then branched off the narrow-guaged, future track - possible 9 to 5, shop work, local lads, Saturday night alright?, 2.5 kids - taking instead the mainline of possibilities to London. "We can do what we want to do. We can do anything." Took Sylvia Young (stage school) to heart for three years. (Small part in Evita: met Madonna.) Other Old girls include: Emma Bunton, 3 All Saints and a Denise Van Outen among others. A place where - "A lot of people were dramatic and emotional." (Princess among drama Queens.) Not only that, but: "People took me seriously." From there it was a first class ticket on an express to our hearts. From - cream of the Wiltshire crop - local girl made good to crop-topped (Six)Teen sensation for the Nation. An Innocent on the Innocent label. A Virgin release… er, daily for the boys for sure. For Billie?… That's her business - showbusiness.

Billie's Essential: Favourite Food: Beans on toast, Chinese, and chocolate. Likes: Clubbing. Hobby: Shopping. Bad Habits: Too much chocolate and dribbling in bed. (Ooer - Ed)

Big Impact: TOTP. Career: (A)Live and Kicking. No.1 Song: 'Because We Want To!…' Organised rebellion for the pre-pubescent. Hormones on the march. The first sweet taste: the wet sheets. Billie a bad girl? "I'm not really a naughty girl. I'm not a goody-goody, but I've always been too scared to be naughty." A good kind of sport(y)? "I put my energy into dancing." Hipsters; midriff tanned and taut; a fixed routine - boys form(N)ation dancing behind her: hey, it's just routine for Billie. Dirty Dancing one of her favourite films. "I think there are certain things that girls should do and certain things boys should do."

Growing up in public: "I do get tired a lot. But I just think that's the price of fame and I don't mind. Because at the end of the day I love what I do." Just growing up: "And you're kissing me in ways I can't tell, If my thoughts of you are true, Then I wanna get with you." And they all want to get with you Billie. So Billie, who does it for you? She once claimed that her dream dates are Puff Daddy and Ma$e. Seems strange that she's ended up with Chris Evans. I suppose it gives hope to all the speccy kids out there. And ginners. "If a boy likes me, I'd rather they just came straight out with it." (Smash Hits, July '98) Wishing and hoping.

The future?… Well apart from the impending marriage, the usual vague "Films and stuff." Undoubtedly the self-described "sassy" young girl will disappear. As will the here-today-gone-tomorrow pop career. The bone structure - satisfying the computer-generated idea of the perfect face - will not. It's a beauty built on solid foundations. Whether the flow of opportunities will remain is almost impossible to say. Will Miss Piper still call the tune as her teens recede? Beauty is skin deep but she has other equally solid foundations: the almost visible Sylvia Young ambition, underpinned by the school's theatrical grounding, and her experience of the tough round of auditions. All will stand her in good stead. A well-rounded showbiz education goes a long way. And she can handle the exposure. Is an FHM photo-shoot the well-rounded exposure she needs? Open jeans and underwear: an inviting cru(o)tch for a career? Wait and see, and all will be revealed?

Billie's feet are still planted firmly in the formative Wiltshire soil with the "normal people," and she determinedly "keeps in touch." Swindon or Sylvia Young's. Stay-at-home or Stardom… She's still One in a Million.

michael white

www2.bomis.com/rings/billiepiper - All the web-based Billie you could ever need.